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I’m Not Sharing!!!

17 May

It’s Mine

First let me say it’s so great to be back and I look forward to getting back on schedule of posting each day. Thanks for being here with me.

Now, on to the topic of today…. To Share or Not to Share… that is the question.

I have a good friend, great mom of 4 that forces her children to share EVERYTHING. When I say force, I don’t mean she nudges or persuades. I mean she literally forces them to share absolutely everything. If someone else wants it, they must surrender it ..no questions asked. Nothing is off limits.

I am the total opposite with my three children. I teach my children that you don’t always get what you want just because you want it. You can ask once but if the answer is no, they must accept it and move on.

I do encourage my children to share but ultimately the decision is up to them whether or not to allow someone else access to the things they’ve worked for and earned.  My logic…. that’s reality. I can’t demand my neighbor to turn over their vehicle simply because I think I’d look great driving it. I can’t run on over and throw my steaks on the grill because the smell of charcoal is making my mouth water. I certainly can’t go skinny dipping in their pool because the heat is getting the better of me. So why in the world would I teach my children that they have no choice in the matter of how to handle their own belongings? More important, why would I dare teach my children they can have whatever they want. That all they’d have to do is throw and fit and it’s theirs?

So, I want to know what the general population of moms out there is thinking? Do you make your kids share or do you allow them to make their own choice in the matter? Take a second to answer the poll and be sure to check back in to see what the majority says.

By all means, leave a comment with your thoughts? Am  I wrong in my thinking? I want to know.

Until I’m proving wrong, I’ll be teaching my kids that no is not a dirty word and just because you want it doesn’t make it yours.

That’s my logic…. Kat Logic.

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3 Comments

Posted by on May 17, 2009 in encouragement

 

3 responses to “I’m Not Sharing!!!

  1. Marvin D Wilson

    May 17, 2009 at 12:04 pm

    Well I’ll be. Look honey – look what the Kat dragged in! (smile)

    Good to see you back, hope this means the health is coming around for the better.

    When I was parenting, the wife and I sort of took each instance of “to share or not” as it came. If a kid is being down right ignorant stubborn stupid selfish, then ya gotta step in and correct a behavior that will lead to troubles as an adult. But for instance, say on a Christmas morning and a kid just got a new toy and a sibling wants to play with it, trying to pry it away, then no … you don’t have to share, not right now when you’re revelling in the treasure of your new fun thing.

    It’s all about balance.

     
  2. unwriter1

    May 17, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    I’m not a mom (I’d look real silly in a dress), but we’ve taught our kids what sharing is, and what it is not. If you want to use, play with, or taste what someone else has, you ask politely. We are firm believers in manners. If the person says no, then no it is. Thankfully we never had them squabble over anything like that.

    Welcome back my friend!!! I and others have missed you. Stay healthy and with us, please.

     
  3. Joyce A. Anthony

    May 18, 2009 at 11:05 pm

    With my sone being an only child, I had to make sure he did not become completely selfish–but I also knew there were some things that he shouldn’t have to share. First, I made rules about not sharing things like his bike–that was not an option. If he was eating something, and there were other kids around, he neded to share if they asked because I found it rude for him to eat in front of other people. If he didn’t want to risk sharing the treat, he needed to either put it away until later when he was alone or eat it inside where he was not with them.

    If something was new, he did not have to share because it was special. If kids were to be visiting, he was told in advance to put away anything he did not want to share-and only keep out what he was willing to share. If the child visiting was a lot younger, he would choose a couple toys appropriate for the younger one–and the rest were off limits.

    All in all, I think he’s learned where a good balance is between sharing and not.

     

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